It's Like Walking Onto A Yacht.

So the other day, I got this little invite to join “Google +”. I think the only thing interesting about this site is that you have to be cordially invited to join like it’s some elite club. No idea how I made the cool list and got an invite. Actually, I have no idea what the site is, but whatever. Best I can tell it's Google's attempt at a Facebook duplicate...with circles. So, upon initial set up, the only thing I could figure out was how to add one measly little photograph for my display picture. 

As I scrolled through the upteen thousands of pictures I have, it went something like this: dog, dog, two dogs, cat, dogs and cat, kittens, horses, dog, horse, dog, oh, there’s one of Brent, dogs……are you seeing the problem? I couldn’t find one picture of just myself that didn’t involve my face being covered in food and/or me looking like Chunk from The Goonies.  So I did what every girl does when they’re a mature respectable adult 16 and bored with their bestie: OHMYGOSHPHOTOSHOOT!!!!!

I’m not vain. But I feel as though I am entitled to a couple good shots that I’m not like “well whatever, my husband thinks I’m hot while covered in marshmallow/dog hair/horse poop, who cares what other people think”.

And  I am DEFINITELY not one of those girls that has a bazillion pictures (usually taken on your phone) of yourself. The typical upward angle with the big eyes trying to pierce the soul of the onlooker OR the downward stare to the floor that throws your attempt at being innocent down the toilet. Don’t forget the arm. In order for this to be considered a true picture of vainness, it must contain your arm, or at least a portion of it. Preferably you’re upper half above the elbow.  So for the love of pete, please don’t forget your arm. '


It looks a little something like this:

or this 

or this

hee...heee...oh wait....woops

Ok, so every girl is entitled to at least one of these. 

Ahem.

My excuses were as follows: The gap between my “done up days” compared to the days I do nothing for myself are getting greater and greater. Speaking of that, I responded to an ambulance call with no makeup and my hair in a ponytail. Which works for any naturally beautiful girl… It wasn’t my hottest moment, I’ll admit, but I was saving lives folks!  There’s no time for makeup and an updo while I’m giving CPR!  Anyway, a fellow  EMT thought it would be flattering for him to tell me I must be having "one of those days”. It’s ok, ‘cause my ugly days are way better than his normal days. Ha…ha.  I can’t help it if I happen to look like a 12 year while taking your blood pressure and sewing your arm back on. My bad.  If you'd rather trade beauty secrets with the medic while they’re helping you, please let me know. I’ll be sure to take my time curling my eye lashes…which I never do normally.

Excuse number dos: My coconspirator was Sophie, and like every young pretty girl, you can never have enough pictures of yourself, so I dragged her along.  Meh anyway, here goes nothing. 

Notice the lack of any food anywhere near or on my face my face. 

to see more of our adventures, check out my facebook! 

Retirement: World's longest coffee break.

I know you might think you have cool parents, but honestly I don't even think you can compare. 

Once upon a time the pretty cheerleader met and fell in love with the cool kid in school. Cool Kid did everything from football to Key Club (good thing it was considered cool then, because he would be SOL these days) . Pretty Girl was a drop dead gorgeous babe and inevitably she just had to marry this Hunk, and then after a good 25 years with each other, I came along...practice makes perfect, they say.

I guess anything and everything that made this cool kid cool flew out the window when he became a dad. That's a lie; he's always been awesome. But something in him led him to believe that every shirt had to be tucked in, hair had to be well groomed, and work came well before any sort of play.  Fast forward to post retirement.  The man is as happening as a Hippie in the 60's. His hair is as free flowing as mine, and somehow we are sporting a similar style haircut. For Father's Day, we went Go-Kart-Racing, and today he conquered the Zip Line. Cool Kid is back in style, and all of the sudden he's part of the "it crowd". I absolutely love this guy. Of course, my Mamma never lost her charm and is as beautiful and spunky as ever.  Though she won't be performing any cheer leading stunts, since her fear of heights anything daring  set in. She still drives the occasional go-karts, drives the jeep, and plays photographer for many of these modern day "Pop Shenanigans". I'm kinda loving this retirement stage of theirs.

(anyone who  knows my Pop: Can you EVER remember his hair being anywhere remotely close to this long?)

                                       

Poppa

Brent waving,

Me holding on for dear life.

Cheap Labor

There is nothing better on a perfect no wind, no snow, above 60 degrees Wyoming day, than to be outside...with your H.H.D's (husband, horses, and dogs) Brent mowed the lawn while the heneymoes and I played in the water. They are recently recovering from a serious case of worms and the winter shag, so to relive them of the summers new found heat, I bathed them. The are hanging out at our house today working as free labor. As Brent calls them; "Free Lawn Mowers". And in a bit, we will ride off into the Sunset of Lyman, Wyomin'. How 'bout them Cowgirls. 

Cheyenne 

Kuruk

Oso

Zip Watching over his Herd. 

Beauty Is Pain, But Love Makes It Worth It.

A year holds so much more than 365 days. And roughly 365 memories ago, on June 12^th, I married Prince Charming…shining armor, white horse and all. Each day over the past year has been so different than the one before. We have had adventures of all kinds, crossed so many obstacles, and accomplished so many dreams.  In the spirit of tradition, we went to Flaming Gorge for some fun in the sun.  Though this year’s anniversary present from him to me caused more physical pain and tears than I ever thought I wanted…it’s hard to believe this is how he chose to show me his love. But in the end; it was totally worth it. ;)

Chop Chop

A few months ago, the little town of Lyman started covering its telephone poles, bulletin boards and mailboxes full of “SPAY AND NEUTER YOUR PET” flyers. Yes, the chop off your manhood and take away your femininity mobile was coming to town. Ah-ha! this. will. solve. everything. everything. What kind of male dog runs away if he has nothing to run to! Appointment set. And as of June 10, 2011 our boys became a little less manly, and a little more….neutral.  Now the funny part about this wasn’t the man-to-man chat Brent had with them moments before their big day, or it wasn’t the jokes about enjoying their last moments as real men and their seemingly understanding of the going-ons. Though those were all highlights of the times leading up the event…the best part of the entire experience was indeed the cones. The Cones of Shame, more precisely.

A dog hopped up on drugs is funny…two dogs on drugs with giant cones on their heads is even better.  The concept of walking, mixed with depth perception issues, unsteady legs, and the alleged cones, makes for a night full of pure entertainment. They spent the first few hours with their heads hung in shame. Tank dosed in and out of consciousness and slumped over at a moment’s notice. Zip just whined. And whined and whined. 

The following stories can only be explained by picture:

Nothing will separate Tank from his food. Come heave or hell, this kid will eat. Let a cone intervene, and pure desperation sets in. As he walked over to his food canister and upon realizing he couldn’t get to the food because of his cone, he grudgingly rested the upper rim of the cone against the food dispenser and sighed in defeat. And sat there for a good five minutes without moving, only letting out a little groan every now and then. 

Zips need for constant attention and acceptance led him to a “foot-in-mouth” problem. Literally. He would put my foot in between his head and his cone so he could have one on one physical contact. Well, when someone would call him, or he heard a noise, or simply wanted to walk away…he couldn’t quite figure out how to separate from my foot, and inevitably get stuck.

And to be expected Tank whined his way out of his Cone of Shame for more than a day, and Zip obliterated his to pieces.

Regardless, all wounds are healing nicely….but their egos have taken a hard hit. 

For It Is By Grace You Have Been Saved Through Faith...

...and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God.

Defending Faith

As Brent and Faith we looking up the scripture to go along with today’s sermon, Faith defends her knowledge of the truth. Future missionary for sure!

“Someone told me once that the Bible was made up. You know what? That made me really sad. So I yelled at them and told them it really is true and they should read it.”


"You make me smile Faith. Amen." 

Graceful Tears

As I left the stage after performing our morning Worship, I glanced down at the girls in their chairs. Grace had tears streaming down her face. When I reached my seat next to her, she collapsed into my arms, drenched with tears.  I asked her what was wrong and why she was crying so. I don’t think I could have gotten a more profound answer from such a beautiful soul. 

“Sometimes, when we sing to God, it makes me so happy that I cry.”
"Me too." I said


We cried together.

How could someone, anyone, deny our God when we have such proof of his unrelenting and constant love for us.  Children are so blessed with God’s knowledge and strong faith that they have a “special window” into His divinity.  Thank God for little children and their ability to teach me the simple things that I have long forgotten. 

"See that you do not look down on one of these little ones. For I tell you that their angels in heaven always see the face of my Father in heaven.

Matthew 18:10

Missing Hairs

I chopped my hair off. 12 inches or something. It’s fun and summery and everything else that is considered hip and trendy. Honestly, I’m just trying to be a cool kid and not really sure how well it’s working out. Ha. Actually I’m not even sure what is considered “cool” these days. But here’s the story with the hair….yes, my hair cut has a story.

It’s around noon on a Thursday and I’m itching for a trim.  My hair was Rapunzel-ish length and in need of a little TLC.  No man would be able to climb up those dead ends if I were to be stuck in a tower.  So, as I perused  my local paper to find the salon number, I get text from Sholly (Sholly: n. PERSON. –alias: Ashley Clark 1. The coolest sister in law ever. 2. Smart beautiful blonde single bombshell. 3. Crazy shenanigan partner of mine.)  stating that she was contemplating hair suicide. What a coincidence! She also had long hair. Hers could probably support a man attempting to climb a tower though. But he’d have to be a pretty dang small man….maybe one of the dwarfs. But then that goes into why would one of the seven dwarfs climb Ashley’s hair…and what the heck is she doing in a tower?! ….back to the original story.

We debated. Settled on a time. And operation “chop off our best physical feature” was a go. Which meant we would have to rely on our awesome personalities from here on out.  I intended on a trim. Like at MOST an inch or two, add a few layers, and call it good, and Ashley was going for a full on buzz cut. Ashley’s influence with a little help from Google Images, persuaded me to consider going a little shorter.  I was on the fence.

3:00pm rolled around. Ashley’s luscious gold(ie) locks fell to the floor. Mind you, she hasn’t had short hair since like…birth-ish. It had just been growing for the last 19 years. All her hard work was gone. But since it’s not the hair that makes the woman look good, it’s the woman that makes the hair…she turned out beautiful. As expected.

Well, she had to leave to give someone a ride, and left me unsupervised for my turn. So of course I chickened out and only cut like 3 inches off. But I did get my layers.  She comes back. Sees my still long hair and is mad. Not like “oh I’m sad we don’t have short hair together” mad…but like “I am seriously ticked right now that you did not chop all your hairs. And now I’m going to be the ONLY person in the WHOLE world with short hair!! What were you thinking!!!!?!! …I! Hate! You!”

She’ll get over it.

So since I know thought I knew Brent didn’t like short hair, I sent him a picture of Ashley’s and told him I cut mine even short. I’m so nice. His response: “Oh boy..I can’t wait to see it”.

Time change to 5:00pm. We are midst highlighting Sholly’s hair via a handy dandy highlighting cap contraption, and Brent walks in, sees my ever present long hair. Ashley, still in her furious state of mind, proceeds to tell Brent how I’m a chicken butt or some other profanity along those lines. Brent agrees. Wait….WHAT?!?  He wants me to cut it shortER. He is covered in soot from work looking like he’s from South of the border and Ashley resembles something seen from a horrible 50’s sy-fy movie.  

Off we go to the salon…again…to cut my hair…again…twice in the same flippin’ day. And they get to go looking just. Like. That. 

Honestly, how could I refuse an opportunity for public humiliation?!

Hence my short hair. J

The End.

Six Legs

Before I get down to what y'all really come here for, I wanted to say a little something about having faith. When it rains, it pours. And God has rocked our little town clear down to it's foundation. And I can honestly say, that whatever trials people are going through, whatever fears they are facing, whatever mountains they have to climb; it's all in His plan. You WILL turn out to be stronger, fearless, and triumphant if you have faith in Him. Keep within His will and do these things for the glory of His name, and trust in Him. We're praying. :)

My lack of absence does not go without justification this time, as many of my previous hiatuses have. This time, it can all be blamed on a couple of fellow redheads. Six legs have been added to the Clark household, and surprisingly they aren't covered in fur. You may have seen them floating around this blog before, but you can expect them to be making regular appearances from here on out. This is for a couple of reason: 1. I will be seeing A LOT more of them, and 2. they don't mind having a camera follow them around constantly...unlike Mr. Brent.  I'll leave the other details up to your imaginative minds, 'cause let's be honest, this town is really good at that.

Since I'm really big on introductions (cat, dog, people...whatever) I will do just that. (I hate when I go to someones blog and they have all these people they talk about, and you have no idea who they are...I feel as though if you're going to have a blog, every detail about every aspect needs to be completely clear! Duh!) 

Trista: The matriarch of the Duncan Clan. The leader of the laughter, the creator of the craziness. The calm to the storm, and the waves to the ocean. Freaking hilarious this woman is. Strong as a rock too.  Definitely my Soul Sister. If you know me, you know her. If you know her, well...you know me. 

Grace: The eldest. Most definitely the more cautious of the two. She has learned her limits and won't dare go past them, though with a little coaxing, she'll try anything once.  Full of giggles and smiles with the occasional emotional moment of pure innocence. Brilliant. And I mean brilliant. She understands so much more than the average seven year old, with the knowledge and experience found in the depths of her books.   She is a "who, what, where, when, and why" child, and finds security in the details. She is never to busy for the hug of a life time.  She is put together, organized, and socially commendable in all occasions.  

Faith: The youngest.  Free spirited, and a modern day hippie.  A fly by the seat of your pants child with no concern of limitations. If ever in need of a laugh, call Faith. The words that come out of her mouth are so funny and outrageously smart, it's almost unbelievable you're taking to a five year old.  There is no need for fresh clothes, combed hair, or clean faces.  (But no worries, Mommy implements those sorts of rules) She is outgoing and will tell anyone about her love for unicorns and princesses.  Her imagination is always one step ahead of her mouth, and will be the one to tell you a bedtime story or sing you a lullaby. She has the ability to speak with animals, imaginary friends, and God on a level so deep you nor I will ever be able to understand...I hope she never grows out of that.

I want to share little blurbs about our adventures, things overheard from the backseat of the car, the bathtub, or the kitchen table.

I'm loving this time in my life. 

Faith's Prayer for Dinner

(I should state that she was recently given a giant stuffed penguin, and it has become the center of our lives)

"Um, Dear God. Please help Penguin with his eye allergies. Help Brent with the fires. Amen"

.....

"Oh ya, and Lizzy with the ambulance that she saves people. Amen again"

Who knew stuffed penguins have eye allergies? 

Grace's Show and Tell Dilemma 

(Grace has fallen in love with Ashley, my sister-in-law, and she was over hanging out with us yesterday. Grace didn't leave her side....I became chopped liver) 

"Gracey, are you still going to bring Zip for show and tell tomorrow?"

"Ya, well....I was thinking I could bring Ashley instead."

Day Seven

A Picture that...

Makes me laugh.

Day Six

A Picture of...

How you would spend the money if you won the lottery.

Build an orphanage. Probably located in a third world country somewhere where homeless children run around...well, homeless. For real though, I would. This isn't some generic Christian answer, as nonchalant as my approach may seem. There is such a need to take care of our youth today, because they really are the future of tomorrow. Across the entire world and right here at home.

Oh ya, and a little bling for myself. 

Day Five

A Picture of...

My Favorite Memory

This memory will always be imprinted in my mind as one of my favorite parts of that day. Our whole wedding day was absolutely spectacular, but a memory that I'll never forget was happening as this picture was being captured.  As I stood over the balcony watching the guests being seated, I happened to glance out the window. It was just in time to notice my husband-to-be walking up the entry way. He had this calm peace about him, but inside I knew he was just as nervous and excited as I was. It was my own moment. A moment to myself in my own mind. While my bridesmaids were watching the people dressed in their Sunday best mill around and socialize, I was focused on one man. He stole my heart and my attention not only for that moment, but for the rest of my life. 

Day Four

A Picture of...

My Night

I spent my night cuddled up on the couch, holding hands with my best friend, as he told me this:

"With every hold of your hand,

touch of your face,

with every smile, laugh, or tear,

or look you glance my way,

I love you more and more."