You were one crappy month. I feel like that's all I have left to say about it, because I have spent so much time and exasperated emotions wasted on you. I want you to know, that I expect great things out of March (March, if you let me down; expect a rotten post to be written about you too) February made me neglect those closest to me without the blink of an eye. You made me remember so much of my unwanted past that I thought was long forgotten. And you pushed so much on my plate way faster than I could eat. As much as I would like to rant and rave about how much I sincerely hate you right now, you have indeed taught me so many lessons that I never thought I would be learning. February, you taught me to be so far beyond humble and materialistic. You threw every worldly possession in my face and let it pass by without a second thought. Because of you, for the first time in a long time, I had to reevaluate what truly matters. To sit down, and really look at what makes life important. The Lord had a plan for us, and I threw every punch I had to not follow, but when He wants something done, He'll do it, rather I go kicking and screaming. You really taught me to listen to the Lord, and I am so grateful for that. In a period of 15 days, you decided to turn my world completely upside down, but I think I am to the point where I'm understanding why. Why you decided to have somethings change, and others stay the same, I'll never know. You shook the foundation of the biggest core, and the smallest, most precious things you kept safely in place. So many things are changing. I'm starting to realize that the location of where my feet are standing is so insignificant. It's all about where my roots are planted.
When Brent and I decided to move, you made the process move way to fast, and here I am, packing my memories away in boxes in between tears and laughter...mostly tears. How can my husband be experiencing the same up's and downs, but consistently be my rock? Brent has this attitude that brightens any situation and makes me feel like I'm standing on the most solid of grounds. He is so good. I loved our home but it's time for a new adventure. An adventure that beings only a few blocks away from here. On a block with new neighbors, a bigger yard, and a fresh coat of paint. I hope that's what this phase is...a fresh coat of paint. It doesn't change what is underneath. No matter what, I will always stay that same original color, but adding a layer freshens it up and adds a new perspective. You can walk into a room, day after day, getting so complacent with the walls. Spruce it up with a coat of color, and the room takes on a whole new dimension. I think that's what my life is doing...re-painting and adding some character. Brent's paint so much brighter than mine. The layers are fewer, but dry and bright. I think that's why you moved so fast...so my paint couldn't dry.
All I can say is this ...Let's pick a color and stick with it for awhile. Preferably something bright.